How to Use Bondage Candles for Hot Wax Play

by Lovehoney

on May 2, 2017

Above: Discover the difference between bondage candles and massage candles with Jess Wilde in this handy video guide.


Dripping hot wax on to your partner from a bondage candle is either a form of intense massage or ultra-erotic BDSM play - it all depends on how you do it.

The exquisite heat and delicious sensations of hot wax make the skin ultra sensitive, leaving your partner ready for all kinds of sexual fun and games…

Making sure that you and your partner are safe and comfortable during hot wax play is of utmost importance and will make sure that no one ends up burned or scalded.

Follow our top tips below to experience the teasing, suspenseful and pleasurable side of hot wax play…


What candles or wax should I use?

Do not use ordinary candles! Regular candles have a high melting point for safety and these will burn or scald the skin.

We recommend using specially designed kinky candles such as this Bondage Candle. These have a much lower melting point, will last for ages and, best of all, they smell and taste great.

Whilst these candles have a lower melting point (and therefore lower overall temperature) they will still produce a slight pang of pain that feels absolutely fantastic. Once you've mastered massage candles, you'll be able to move onto hotter wax candles like the Bondage Boutique Fetish Drip Bondage Candles.


How can I safely indulge in hot wax play?

There are a few important safety points to remember when enjoying hot wax play, especially if you’re the one dripping the wax:

- Test the temperature on yourself first to gauge safety and comfort levels. Use a discreet area of your body and drip the wax at the speed you will be dripping it on your partner. If you think it’s painful, then your partner probably will too.

- Hold the candles 18 inches away from the skin. Although the temperature is naturally much lower, this extra distance will allow the wax to cool to a safe level. You can then move the candle closer or further away from your partner’s skin, depending on how they feel.

- The skin will become more and more sensitive with each drop of wax! Whilst this is great for edge play, it does mean that your partner will start to notice more pain, the longer you continue. Make sure to keep checking how your partner feels and stop when it gets too much.

- Safe words are important during all BDSM play, but especially when using hot wax. Get your partner to use the traffic lights system to tell you how they’re feeling during the hot wax play. Green means ‘that feels good, please carry on’, yellow means ‘it’s starting to hurt so be careful’ and red means ‘stop immediately’.

- Once hot wax cools, it’s tough to remove from fabrics or hair, so unless you’re hoping to give your partner a hair removal treatment, make sure to shave and aim the wax carefully. It is also recommended that you put down a plastic sheet to save your bed sheets and carpet too.


What areas of the body should I be using hot wax on?

Bondage Boutique Bondage CandlesHot wax feels good on less sensitive areas such as the shoulders and back. Start here and then slowly move to more sensitive areas such as the stomach, bottom and thighs.

Avoid the face and be especially careful with delicate areas such as the nipples, genitals and navel. We do not recommend getting even remotely close to these areas until you are experienced with hot wax play and have discovered the right candles for you.


How do I use bondage candles?

Dripping is the most common technique of hot wax play and is easy to do with a Lovehoney Oh! Vanilla Lickable Massage Candle. Here are our basic guidelines for dripping wax:

1. Get your partner to lie down on a plastic sheet, then light the candle.
2. Once a pool of wax has collected at the bottom, quench the flame and allow to cool slightly.
3. Use the spout to test the first few drops on the back of your hand from a distance of 18 inches. If it’s too hot for you, then it will be too hot for you partner.
4. Move it further away and drip again until the temperature of the wax feels comfortable.

5. Start dripping it on your partner’s shoulders and back, slowly moving to other areas once they are feeling comfortable and you're more confident with the candles.

Lovehoney Oh! Strawberry Lickable Massage Candle 60g

Another way to use hot wax is to paint it on.

To begin with, try this with the Lovehoney Oh! massage candles. When lit, these candles turn into a massage oil that you can spread around with a soft brush or your hands. This is a good way to experiment with the painting technique.

Not only does the combination of brush bristles and hot wax feel brilliant but it also allows you to create beautiful works of art, using your partner’s naked body as the canvas. As intimidating as playing with hot wax and bondage candles seems, if you follow our tips you can enjoy the pleasurable side of hot wax play with just the right amount of pain!


More advanced?

If you and your partner have been enjoying massage candles and are ready to look for more of a challenge, try moving on to some of our more advanced hot wax candles, like the Bondage Boutique Hot Wax Bondage Candles.

These candles burn at a higher temperature, meaning the sensation is much more intense. You may find that these candles produce a more painful sting, and may even leave marks on the skin that last for 24-48 hours after play.


Need more help?

You can Contact Customer Care, who will be able to help you find the perfect bondage gear. You can send an email any time, and telephone or live chat to an experienced advisor.

Contact Lovehoney Customer Care


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Written by Lovehoney. For collaborative posts between Lovehoney team members and guest authors
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Originally published on May 2, 2017. Updated on Aug 6, 2020
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